Forbidden Love – Part 4

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Chapter 4

The sunlight streaking through the blinds awoke me the following morning. When I sat up I realized that, in addition to my piss hardon, I had an incredible throbbing headache. It must have been the wine. Then I remembered what had happened last night. A sudden veil of dread washed over me and I fell back onto the pillow. I threw my hands to my face. What had I done? I thought. I might have destroyed the most important relationship in my life. I didn’t think I could live with that. How was I going to face my mother? I knew that I had really screwed up this time.

I looked at the clock and saw that it was after 9 a.m. I had gone to sleep at about 10 last night, so I had been asleep for almost 11 hours and yet I felt I could go back to sleep. I forced myself to get up and take a shower. When I was dressed I reluctantly went downstairs to face my mother. I knew I had to do it sooner or later. I had formulated this big apology, all about how I had drank too much wine, and how I would never do that again if she could forgive me.

When I walked into the kitchen I found my mom washing out her coffee cup at the sink. I didn’t say anything as I sat at the kitchen counter.

“Oh, you’re finally up, sleepyhead,” she said with a cheerful smile.

That surprising smile brightened my day enormously. “Yeah, and I have one heck of a headache. I guess I drank too much wine last night,” I said, laying the groundwork for my apology.

“Too much wine will do that. A good cup of coffee and a couple of Advil will help. Been there a few times myself.”

I sat there stunned as she prepared me a cup of hot coffee as if nothing had happened last night. Yet, I knew it had. I could see her swollen and wet pussy every time I closed my eyes. It would have been a pleasnt image, but guilt forced me to try to banish it from my brain.

My mother walked over and sat the cup of coffee on the counter and laid a couple of Advil’s next to it. “I’m going to go to the gym with Gail and then I have some shopping to do. After that I need to run to the cleaners,” she said. “What are you doing today?”

I hadn’t noticed that my mother had on her exercise clothes. I don’t know how I missed it, because she looked great. Her legs were tanned and looked incredible in the tight shorts. I must have been staring because she said, “Earth to Jerry.”
“Oh, sorry. As soon as this headache goes away I’m going to try and clean out the garage like I’ve been promising for a month. Then I’ll do a little studying.”

“Sounds good. We can put some hamburgers on the grill tonight if you want.”

“Great,” I said enthusiastically. My enthusiasm was more about my mother’s bubbly disposition then about the burgers. She seemed to have totally forgotten about last night. If she blamed me for any of it, it wasn’t apparent. Then she leaned over and kissed me on the lips. It was such a surprise that I didn’t respond immediately.

“Still can’t guess, huh?”

I looked at her quizzically. Then it dawned on me. “Oh, the lipstick.” She must have had the same flavor on as she did yesterday. “Cherry.”

“Finally, but now that you’ve guessed it I’ll have to try another flavor,” she said with a smile. “Well, got to cover up these exercise clothes or I might get arrested going into the gym.” As she turned and walked out of the room I stared at her creamy thighs and ass in her tight shorts. She looked back at me but didn’t say anything, just smiled. Her smile lit up the entire room. I would have given a million dollars to know what she was thinking at that moment.

I smiled back and my heart started beating faster. God, how I loved her. It was so wrong, but there was nothing I could do about it. I don’t think we really have control over who we love, it just happens. I knew that it was not normal to love your mother like this. What I felt was the tingling, heart racing, butterflies in the stomach, kind of love.

Later that evening we sat close to one another on the back porch swing after eating, watching the sun go down. It was a beautiful sunset, but strangely it made me sad. The ever present thought that I would be going away to college after the summer vacation gnawed at my stomach. I was also thinking about what had happened last night. Neither of us had mentioned it and I was starting to wonder if it had just been a dream.

“What’s wrong?” my mother asked.

“Nothing.”

“You had a very sad look on your face.”

I didn’t look at her but said, “It’s just that I’ll be leaving in a couple of months.”

“You’ll only be five hundred miles away.”

“Right, ‘only’ five hundred miles,” I responded.

“I can come and visit on special weekends and you’ll come home on holidays.”

“Yeah, but … but how are you going to get … get along without me?” I asked, my eyes tearing and my voice cracking. A better question might have been; how was I going to get along without her?

My mother didn’t answer. But she reached over and took my hand, holding it gently without saying a word. I was pretty sure she was feeling the same as me.

“We’ll get along somehow,” she finally said without conviction. “Let’s take a walk down to the old barn before it gets dark.”

The “old barn” was a remnant of a previous owner who worked the property as a horse farm for years until his death. His children parceled the land and sold it in five-acre plots. The old barn was on our property so we often went to sit on bales of hay to watch the sun go down over the mountains. It was a special place for both of us and helped us both heal after Dad left.

My mother led me down the back steps toward a well-worn path that twisted through the woods to the barn. I loved the feeling of her warm hand in mine. There was a cool, gentle breeze rustling through the trees and the sky was crystal blue with a few clouds on the horizon to the west. I glanced over and saw that the breeze had made my mother’s nipples hard. I quickly looked away, chastising myself for the ever-present carnal thoughts about my own mother.

When we arrived at the barn, we sat down close to one another on bails of hay. The sun was close to slipping below the mountains and some dark clouds had begun to roll in. We could see what was left of the winter’s snow on the highest peaks. It was a gorgeous view and our special place where we could talk, or just sit and be together. I put my arm around her and pulled her close. She laid her head on my shoulder. Sometimes it wasn’t necessary to say a word.

After we had sat silently for some time I said, “Mom, are you sorry that you never found another man?”

“I have a man,” she said and squeezed my hand.

“You know what I mean. I’m not like a husband.”

“But you are my best friend.”

“And you’re mine, but that wasn’t my question.”

My mother sighed as she stared out of the barn toward the mountain. “Truthfully, when you were younger, it would have been a big help to have a man around the house. I mean you were a good boy, but I didn’t know much about raising a teenaged boy.”

“I think you did a great job.”

My mother smiled and placed her hand against my face. “I think so too. But it would have been nice to have a man around to teach you things … to have talks about things like girls and six,” she said and blushed prettily.

“Don’t worry, us kids learn all we need to know from TV and the Internet.”

“That’s what I was afraid of,” she said with a laugh.

I paused before asking the next question. “Did you want to have more children?”

It took her a few moments to answer. Finally she said, “Yes I did, back when you were ten or eleven, but your father was dead set against it.”

“It’s not too late … I mean you’re only 37 so you can still have them if you found someone. I’m sure with your looks, that would be incredibly easy.”

“Thanks. But I have you.”

“Come on, Mom,” I said.

“The truth is that I’m not sure I could have another child, even if I met someone.”

“Why?”

“Well, we tried for several years and nothing happened, so we gave up. Then your father left us. I figured it just wasn’t meant to be.”

Then I remembered something. One day my father was home from work and he had a doctor’s appointment. I went with him. I had asked what was wrong and he said nothing, he was there for a physical to get a vasectomy. He explained what that a vasectomy was so he and Mom wouldn’t have any more children. It didn’t mean much to me at that time. I couldn’t quite remember how old I was then, but I think I was nine or ten.

I must have had a perplexed look on my face because she said, “What’s wrong?”

I didn’t want to spoil the moment, and besides, I could have been wrong about my age. If he had had a vasectomy before they were “trying” to get pregnant, me telling her now would just rub salt into the wounds of their failed marriage. “Uh nothing, I was just thinking how nice it is to be here with you right now. It’s so peaceful here. I’m going to miss coming here with you when I’m gone.”

My mother looked into my eyes and I saw them begin to tear. As a lone tear spilled from her eye and began to trickle down her cheek I leaned over and gently wiped it off with my thumb. My hand rose almost without conscious thought and settled behind her neck. We stared into each other’s eyes for what seemed a long time. With very little urging from me her head began to move forward until our lips were just a fraction of an inch apart. Her eyes were closed as if waiting for me to kiss her.

Slowly I opened my mouth and touched hers. I heard a tiny whimper come from the back of her throat as our lips pressed together. Then it was my turn to moan when I felt my mother’s tongue slowly slip into my mouth. I began to tremble as I sucked her tongue, pulling her sweet tasting saliva into my mouth.

Without a conscious effort from either of us she was suddenly on her back with me pressed to her chest. Our lips were pressed firmly, yet tenderly, together as her tongue explored my mouth. My tongue pressed against hers, circling her slippery probe before slipping into her mouth. I heard a moan as she began to suck my tongue. My hand somehow ended up resting just below one breast. I felt her tremble as my fingers moved. They crept slowly upward until my hand covered one soft breast. My cock was throbbing so much that I thought I might climax. I actually had my hand on my mother’s breast! Before she could protest my fingers moved over her top and hooked under the elastic of her strapless tube top. Quickly I pulled it downward. My mother’s breath hissed into my still searching mouth as I bared her breast. I paused there for a moment to allow her to stop me. When she didn’t my hand covered her now bare breast.

“Mmmmm,” she gasped into my mouth.

Her breast was amazing. The skin was smooth and warm to the touch and the hard nipple felt as if it was on fire, threatening to scorch the palm of my hand. I circled my palm slowly around the nipple before placing it between my index finger and thumb. When I squeezed my mother gasped again. Her back arched and a loud moan came from deep in her throat.

I pulled away from her lips and began to kiss down her neck. She closed her eyes and rested her hand on the back of my head. I moved slowly, hoping upon hope that she wouldn’t stop me. I kissed down the smooth flesh of one globe and then pulled slightly back to look at the engorged nipple. With a whimper I dropped my head and took it into my mouth.

“Oh my God,” my mother gasped.

The taste of her sweet flesh was amazing and my cock throbbed in my pants. My juices were already soaking though my underwear. I opened my mouth wide and took as much of her breast into my mouth as I could before letting it slip out to grasp the nipple again.

I was sucking like a baby starved for milk when I felt my mother gently pushing my head. I thought it was over until she directed my mouth toward the other tit. I moaned as I began to suck the second tit. I worried the hard nipple before I gently bit down with my teeth. I heard her moan. The pulsing in my pants was very intense as I pushed my cock against her leg, moving my hips up and down. But before I could climax in my pants I felt her gently push my head back. I thought about resisting for a second but knew better. I released the tit and looked down at her flushed face.

She whispered, “The sun’s gone down, we had better get back.”

I didn’t press my luck. I squeezed her breast warmly one last time and then bent over and kissed the nipple before reluctantly pulling away and letting her sit up. Her distended nipple was shiny with my saliva. She casually pulled her top over her bare breast and stood up, reaching her hand down for me. I took it and arose to face her. Looking into her eyes I opened my arms. She stepped into my embrace and we hugged for a long time. I could feel her heart still beating rapidly. The thumping matched the rhythm of my own heart. I let my arms slide slowly down her back until I had both of her jeans covered ass cheeks in my hands.

I knew that she could feel my erection, which I didn’t try to hide this time. There was no indication that she minded and in fact it seemed that she was pressing her hips to me. It was almost too much for me and I had to pull away or again risk cumming in my pants.

We walked silently back to the house, hand in hand. My throbbing erection tented my pants, and there was a wet spot on my shorts, but I no longer felt embarrassed. It was a proud symbol of how I felt about my mother and I think she liked it.